The Road to El Dorado

KEVIN KLINE AND KENNETH BRANAGH

 

We are working a con, walking the razor’s edge. On one side, gold. On the other side… [Gestures to a mural of human sacrifice] …painful, agonizing failure!

~ Tulio

 

quick fox: B+ | Silver

winding dragon

A surefire way for animated movies to get a laugh is to have an equine sidekick. Mushu has a few great lines about Mulan’s horse, Khan (“dishonor on your cow!”), Shrek 2 surprised everyone when Donkey turned into a beautiful stallion, and Maximus’ swordsmanship skills are impeccable in Tangled

But one of the more under-appreciated horses in animated films is Altivo from The Road to El Dorado. During the film, he steals keys from the guard just so he can eat an apple, gets a golden pedicure from the citizens of El Dorado, deliveries some well-timed comedic facial expressions, and is revered as the gods’ horse. My favorite moment is when Altivo mouths the words “El Dorado” along with Tulio and Miguel when they enter the golden city.

Really, though, Altivo is just one example of how much this film is under-appreciated. It has a simple storyline, but the sharp dialogue (primarily based in false bravado and childish bickering) and physical comedy (exaggerated arm flailing and unamused facial expressions are most common) make the film feel much richer. 

The Road to El Dorado (2000) is a slightly dubious film for DreamWorks Animation because its stars are two pretty despicable people. Tulio (Kevin Kline) and Miguel (Kenneth Branagh) are fugitive con artists who escape arrest for gambling with loaded dice by stowing away on a ship. The only problem is that this is the Age of Exploration, and the religious zealot Hernan Cortes thinks a proper punishment for stowaways is slavery on a Cuban sugar plantation. One escape plan later, courtesy of Altivo and a longboat, Tulio and Miguel find themselves in unknown territory. Using a map they stole/won in gambling, the two friends (and Altivo) stumble across the legendary city of El Dorado. There they are hailed as gods, and in a strange reversal of fortune (literally), Tulio and Miguel realize if they continue the deception, they can steal all the gold their hearts desire—and more. Tulio is half-seducer, half-seduced by Chel (Rosie Perez), a spunky local of El Dorado, and Miguel starts to fall in love with the city itself. Still, they set the moral bar so low that it takes a fanatic cult leader who tries imposing human sacrifice in order for the rapscallions to be seen as “heroes.” 

Perhaps that’s why The Road to El Dorado was a flop—76 million box office for a 95 million budget film—parents and critics were squeamish with presenting a film to kids starring characters with hardly any redemptive qualities. Personally, Tulio and Miguel’s moral depravity is what makes the film so much fun. They skid through life with a little help from ball-shaped armadillos, volcanic eruptions, and Elton John musical montages, and the nonstop outrageousness of their incidental success is hilarious. Tulio’s schemes for riches and Miguel’s endless optimism create a perfect friendship.

I suppose somebody could argue that The Road to El Dorado feels more like an extended episode of a long-running television series than a complete story—mainly because it bails on its promise of a war between the Conquistadors and people of El Dorado—but the adventurous spirit is never lost. If nothing else, then The Road to El Dorado was made for the Internet and the age of memes.